So, this idea of luke-warm Christianity has been brought to my attention recently and I'm just now beginning to give it a lot of thought. To me, the first thing that comes to mind is the parable of the minas that Jesus tells in Luke 19. Essentially there is a king that gives 10 of his servants a mina (essentially just money) and commands them "put this money to work until I come back". The parable focuses on 3 of the servants. One gained 10 more minas, one gained 5, and the other returned the single mina that was given to him originally. The king was pleased with the two servants that multiplied their money. However, to the man who did nothing with the gift that he had given him, he was furious.
That is kind of how I view this idea of luke-warm Christianity. I am given a gift in the salvation that comes through grace alone in Jesus Christ. I am called by that grace to make disciples in His name. However, what happens if I don't do anything with that gift? If I just put it away, keep it safe, but don't let anyone know that I have it? Am I truly grateful for that gift? Do I really believe that I even have what that gift has to offer? You see, when we have money, we have the opportunity to make more money. No matter how little money we have. How is that any different than the gift that was given to us by Jesus Christ? We were given salvation through no works of our own, but only by faith. Why should we hide that? Why should we keep that to ourselves and act like we don't have it?
The problem with luke-warm Christianity is that at the base of it lies a problem with insecurity and identity. I am so worried about my perceived identity and therefore I don't have faith, I don't step out and trust, I don't live according to the Word, I don't speak up, I don't have self control, I wade through sin as if there aren't going to be any repercussions. But that's not it. That's not what Christianity is. I forget that the Gospel is offensive. I forget that Jesus came to bring division. I forget that the road is narrow and few will find it. I pick out the things in the Gospel that I like and I ignore the others as if I have the authority to do that. Real Christianity does not pick and choose at the Gospel. It doesn't shout the things that Jesus whispers and whisper the things that Jesus shouted. Real Christianity is based off of how and why Christ lived. That's what produces fruit. That's what I want.
It's so easy to preach, discuss, live, and "advertise" the parts of the Gospel that offer endless grace to those who live by it. But when it comes down to it, the Gospel doesn't offer free grace to those who ignore God's commands. The grace of Jesus INSPIRES me to live a Christ-like life. Will I be perfect? NO. That's not possible. But through continual repentance and clinging onto the cross, I am presented faultless before God.
One incredible thing about the cross is that He didn't wait for me to clean up. He didn't wait for me to hear about grace to die. No, He died for me before I knew Him. Before I knew what his grace was. Before I knew what it would mean for my life. He's had holes in his hands THE WHOLE TIME. He didn't wait. So why should I? Why should I wait to become more "mature"? Why should I live a life of luke-warm Christianity? I shouldn't. And ya know what? I won't. This is real. This is life. It's not at all easy. It's not my life, either. I was bought for a price with the blood of Jesus Christ, creator of the universe, born in a stable, tortured, killed, and raised to life. Can I sit here and tell you that my life is mine? I'd be a fool.
Pray for me.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
An Unexpected Transformation
The other day I posted my thoughts from the previous week that expressed the complacency that I was feeling toward my distance from God. However, even before I posted that, God came in, destroyed my doubts, granted me peace, forgiveness, and the love that I was searching for.
It's quite unbelievable how God reveals himself to those who follow him. (Of course, I'm using the term unbelievable in the figurative sense, for God himself is very believable). He uses people, moments, conversations, logic, interactions, and he even uses sin. Throughout this break from school I've been running in the opposite direction of God, yet he keeps tripping me up; not allowing me to get too far from him. He finally picked me up and turned me around the other night after having a conversation with my good friend Tim Dirksen.
But before I go into the details of this conversation let me tell you about the moments in which God revealed himself to me that led up to this unexpected transformation. On Sunday in church a song was sung that praises God for how wonderful, powerful, and loving He truly is. It is a very up beat song that was driven by bass and vocals. Sarah Timlin was leading worship and she essentially led the vocals in the song. I'll tell you this: I will never forget the look on her face, the power in her voice, the sheer joy that she felt. She was worshipping. She was worshipping the God that created her with every ounce of her being. She was smiling ear-to-ear, singing her heart out. And it was beautiful. God was shining through her brighter than I had ever seen Him shine through a human being.
Another God sighting occurred in a short conversation I had with my Father a few days after New Years. We were briefly discussing my excursion up to the Poconos in which a lot of "partying" took place. He gently told me "Look, JP. You can't keep going on living this double life. It would be one thing if it only affected you, but it affects all of those around you. You have a great opportunity to witness to your friends but if you're living just the way that they are, what's the difference between you and them?" It was short, sweet, and to the point. It was exactly what I needed to hear.
What did God do next? He enabled me to be completely open with Tim Dirksen for 4 hours about how I had been feeling. I stopped using the phrase "distant from God" and started telling it how it was and said "Tim, I am straight up sprinting in the opposite direction of God". It was freeing. It felt incredible to finally be open and honest with someone about my actual emotions instead of just beating around the bush. We talked about why I was continually putting up with the sin patterns in my life. We talked about why is the Gospel so powerful, yet I am still able to live a sinful life.
Through everything we discussed, nothing meant more to me than answering the question: "Why, if this Christian life is so hard, do we push on? Why do we die to ourselves and serve the Lord when living for ourselves is so much easier?" The simple answer is two-fold. One day, far into the future, I am going to look the creator of the universe in the eye; face to face with my God I am going to say "Here I am. Take me in. I'm not perfect, but I tried." What is more beautiful than that? The other part of the answer is this: even though living for oneself may be easier, where will you find yourself at the end of your life? If the only purpose you have is to please yourself, to be successful, make a lot of money, achieve "happiness", well...then what? Do you throw the towel in and say, "well, I lived a good life". If that's the case for you, okay. But I urge you to think twice; search for something more. Because it exists. It exists in living for the God that was beaten, murdered, and raised to life for the wrongs that you and I have committed. It's not going to be easy, and you're sure as hell not going to do it perfectly, but I can promise you that it will be worth it.
So now, here I am, finally growing. I am not complacent, though. I realized that complacency does not only exist in times of struggle and hardship, but during fruitful times as well. There is always something new to learn, and for the rest of my life I will be striving to grow closer and closer to God.
Pray for me.
It's quite unbelievable how God reveals himself to those who follow him. (Of course, I'm using the term unbelievable in the figurative sense, for God himself is very believable). He uses people, moments, conversations, logic, interactions, and he even uses sin. Throughout this break from school I've been running in the opposite direction of God, yet he keeps tripping me up; not allowing me to get too far from him. He finally picked me up and turned me around the other night after having a conversation with my good friend Tim Dirksen.
But before I go into the details of this conversation let me tell you about the moments in which God revealed himself to me that led up to this unexpected transformation. On Sunday in church a song was sung that praises God for how wonderful, powerful, and loving He truly is. It is a very up beat song that was driven by bass and vocals. Sarah Timlin was leading worship and she essentially led the vocals in the song. I'll tell you this: I will never forget the look on her face, the power in her voice, the sheer joy that she felt. She was worshipping. She was worshipping the God that created her with every ounce of her being. She was smiling ear-to-ear, singing her heart out. And it was beautiful. God was shining through her brighter than I had ever seen Him shine through a human being.
Another God sighting occurred in a short conversation I had with my Father a few days after New Years. We were briefly discussing my excursion up to the Poconos in which a lot of "partying" took place. He gently told me "Look, JP. You can't keep going on living this double life. It would be one thing if it only affected you, but it affects all of those around you. You have a great opportunity to witness to your friends but if you're living just the way that they are, what's the difference between you and them?" It was short, sweet, and to the point. It was exactly what I needed to hear.
What did God do next? He enabled me to be completely open with Tim Dirksen for 4 hours about how I had been feeling. I stopped using the phrase "distant from God" and started telling it how it was and said "Tim, I am straight up sprinting in the opposite direction of God". It was freeing. It felt incredible to finally be open and honest with someone about my actual emotions instead of just beating around the bush. We talked about why I was continually putting up with the sin patterns in my life. We talked about why is the Gospel so powerful, yet I am still able to live a sinful life.
Through everything we discussed, nothing meant more to me than answering the question: "Why, if this Christian life is so hard, do we push on? Why do we die to ourselves and serve the Lord when living for ourselves is so much easier?" The simple answer is two-fold. One day, far into the future, I am going to look the creator of the universe in the eye; face to face with my God I am going to say "Here I am. Take me in. I'm not perfect, but I tried." What is more beautiful than that? The other part of the answer is this: even though living for oneself may be easier, where will you find yourself at the end of your life? If the only purpose you have is to please yourself, to be successful, make a lot of money, achieve "happiness", well...then what? Do you throw the towel in and say, "well, I lived a good life". If that's the case for you, okay. But I urge you to think twice; search for something more. Because it exists. It exists in living for the God that was beaten, murdered, and raised to life for the wrongs that you and I have committed. It's not going to be easy, and you're sure as hell not going to do it perfectly, but I can promise you that it will be worth it.
So now, here I am, finally growing. I am not complacent, though. I realized that complacency does not only exist in times of struggle and hardship, but during fruitful times as well. There is always something new to learn, and for the rest of my life I will be striving to grow closer and closer to God.
Pray for me.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Complacency
Last time I wrote I expressed my distance from God. When I wrote that, I was restless; actively looking for a way to find God again. Here I am, about 2 months later, probably "further" from God, complacent. Doubts have swallowed my heart. Not doubts about who God is, but doubts about whether or not He even exists. Really scary doubts. My life has slowly but surely morphed back into the way it was before I even understood who God is.
All my life I have believed in a God who claims this:
I am all powerful, all knowing, omnipotent, omnipresent, and I have created everything you see, touch, taste, hear. Sense. There is no good that exists apart from me. All of the evil that exists in the world is due to the choices that my creation (humans) has made. I have sent my son into the world to become a human, to live a perfect life, and ultimately be crucified and raised to life. Why? Because I created you, and I love you. I want to redeem your poor decisions that create evil by giving you a way to salvation and eternal life with me in Heaven. However, while you are on this earth this will not be an easy road. It is narrow and difficult. However this truth still exists: My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, boast all the more in your weaknesses so that my power may rest on you.
That's the God that I'm supposedly following. But I'm having a lot of trouble doing it. I'm finding it harder and harder to let go of my vices, to resist temptations, to forget insecurities, to give myself fully to him as he commands.
Jesus says this in Luke 14
“If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple. And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple."
That's some heavy stuff... God doesn't want half of us, or even 99%. God wants every second of our lives to glorify him. I am weak. I do not have the power to do that, which is why Jesus did what he did. But his suffering on the cross demands a life of faith that I am unable to live. I don't know the balance between "using" his unlimited grace and living for him.
So here I am. Through my first semester of college. Broken, scared, doubting, living, doing what I want to do. Not paying attention to God's commands for my life. And honestly, complacent. I'm having fun following the sinful desires of my heart.
So I'm waiting. Waiting for God's mercy and love to capture my heart as it once did. Do I have to meet him half way? I don't think so. I want God to accept me as I am. To meet me in my needs, my struggles, my temptations, and my sinful desires. Because Jesus has gone through the temptations and the sufferings. Because Jesus suffered, was tempted, beaten, tortured, ridiculed, killed. Jesus even wept for me.
Come, God. I'm inviting you in.
Pray for me. Please.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)